Thursday, 10 March 2011

Hello to Van Hire Bristol!

A quick hello to Van Hire Bristol who added a comment to our co-existence post, the one that showed a white van turning into Cotham Hill without bothering to look, because the driver knew that mostly only people on bicycles come down the hill, and any pedestrians crossing at that point are students and therefore liabilities on the state.

Whoever it was that posted the comment made some well informed comments showing their mastery of the the English language, and their complete failure to read the bit where we warn that anyone posting adverts will be publicly criticised, along with ignorance of the nofollow attribute hence the fact that adding comments to a high page-ranked site like ours does nothing for their own ranking:
Hey I like the post very much. This is really a very good post with very good information.

Thanks a lot for sharing the post very much. You know what I like the title of video very much which insist to watch the video to me. :)

Keep sharing such stuffs.

Well, we don't care whether you like the title or whether you think it's a really good post with very good information, and we shall keep sharing such stuffs without being asked. What we want to know is this? Is the white van YB06BDO one of the Van Hire Bristol fleet?

Furthermore, if we rent a van from you:
  1. Does it automatically come with pre-insurance cover for running over bicycles and pedestrians?
  2. Will you be upset if comes back with scratches and blood on the bumper?
  3. Does it have a tow bar to provide audible feedback when reverse parking (crunching sounds)
  4. What driver training will you provide showing us how to drive and park such vehicles, especially while texting?
Regarding the comment itself, a few more questions
  • Did you actually pay somebody to write such an atrociously badly written comment?
  • What did they promise in return? 
  • Did they read the warning notice before they commented, and did they understand the consequences of their action, namely that they consented to have your site discussed in a posting all of its own?
  • How does it feel to have a web page making fun of you (as promised in the comment form) come back ahead of you in searches?
  • Given that some people may view the video as portraying a mildly negative opinion of white vans in the city -despite our own view that they are an essential part of the national economy- do you feel that it is wise to have your brand associated with such incidents?
  • Did you ask the person who promised to boost your page to read the pages first? Will you request this in future?
  • Have you asked your outsourced SEO agent about nofollow tags and the fact that they mean that none of our google pagerank (5) transfers to yours (0) -and that the comments have at best no effect whatsoever?
  • Are you aware that because Google own blogspot, there is the possibility that at worst they will use the URLs in postings downgraded as spam to actually penalise such sites in their search engine?
  • Have you a way of asking for your money back?
Remember, the Bristol Traffic project is a data gathering and datamining organisation that views Google and Yahoo! as strategic partners; Game Theory  and Graph Theory key branches of mathematics to model traffic movement around cities. We do not yet see any value in strategic or tactical alliances with Van Hire Bristol, whoever you are, so will be forced to block any further attempts to add comments to our site.

Thank you for your participation in the Bristol Traffic Project.


waronthemotorist said...

I suspect that the website is no more real than the comment, given the vague address, the "testimonial" from Xavier Thomas (erm..., and boilerplate images and forms. Wouldn't be surprised if there were identical sites for towns all over the world. Phishing is getting ever more desperate, it seems.

I work with a team of Chinese software developers. They do frequently write emails requesting more informations and delivering new stuffs...


SteveL said...

looking more at the site, I think it has to be a spoof. In the about us page "your British license allows you to drive a vetches up to a lotion size which is quite large and adequate too. " I am not sure what that means at all.

Amusing they have a captcha to stop people automatically spamming the site. I might right 5 lines of Pyton to get the captcha images 5 million times an hour and see what happens.