Wednesday 11 November 2009

Cycling too fast!

We have another complaint about bicycles, not the usual pavement, tax avoidance or clothing issues -one that is not taken up by the mainstream press yet.

Some of the cyclists in our city are simply cycling too fast!

They sprint along our streets, down the hills, and eventually, into our cars. At which point we, the drivers, get the blame for pulling out without looking -whereas its clearly these tax-dodging underpeople's fault for sprinting round the city creating accidents.

Take this view of Nine Tree Hill, secretly recorded. The tax-dodging lycra-lout is going down the hill so fast they barely have time to brake for the car that pulls out of the side road without warning

The driver was lucky that they managed to accelerate away -only their reflexes prevented a major accident. And you know who would get the blame don't you? The driver -always us. There's even some EU legislation which would make such blame assignment automatic, which is another reason to oppose the EU.

Fortunately, we still have the police on our side. Here is a photo of Dru Marland's collision where a car turning right from Worcester Road onto College Road, turned into Dru, who was going along College Road with the right of way, turning right.

We were worried that after this incident, it would be the car that got the blame -when if the bicycle had not been there, there would not have been any accident!

The police have finished their investiation, and here we are pleased to announce that they will not be citing the driver, paritally because Dru "was riding too fast", according to a witness.

We now hope that since the police have reached this conclusion, Dru will be compensating the driver for the damage done to their bumper, with additional compensation for the damage to their reputation.

6 comments:

Chris Hutt said...

BT - "...the car that pulls out of the side road without warning"

So what 'warning' should the car have given? Surely the fact that the cyclist was using a road paid for by motorists was adequate warning in itself that cars might pull out in front of them at any moment.

Dru Marland said...

Shockin' fast, that downhill bicycle; I'd estimate the speed at possibly in excess of ten miles per hour. I would like to propose that cyclists be preceded by a pedestrian with a red flag. That'll stop their nonsense.

SteveL said...

I think actually the nine-tree-hill dove street junction could have a warning to the oncoming bicycles "cars pull out from side roads without giving way". Artwork suggestions welcome

Adam said...

This sets a good precedent for me now being able to "witness" and report all the cars that actually are speeding down my road, in a 20mph zone that already exists, and getting the Police believing me and prosecuting every one of them then? Good to know witness statements are all that is needed for the cases to be brought to a conclusion and the appropriate legal procedures to be taken now. I'm off out to witness all the wrong doing in Bristol. I think you'll notice a marked difference when you go out in the next few days. No one will be speeding or talking on mobiles when driving as I'll have witessed them, reported it and the Police will have sorted them all out. Everything solved. Brilliant.

bramblejam said...

I'll help, Adam. I'll look out for the ones with no seatbelts.

Old Holborn said...

We don't have to give "warning". Surely, the emphasis is on the cyclist (let's face it, no more than a coat hanger with wheels made out of cobwebs) to get out of the way of 2 tons of recycled Hotpoint freezers and IKEA bookcases.

When was the last time anyone complained about being run over by a tank FFS!?