Hints of a left hook

Nothing spells "left hook" like a van coming up alongside with its indicators on. However, this one did actually wait for the cyclist to get past.



For London viewers: note the stressful conditions of Bristol streets. This is actually Sustrans NC4, as marked by some fading paint.

For ABD members from Weston Super Mare and 1973: note the parking spaces stolen by the RPZ, the cyclists in one direction, and how a van was held from turning by another bicycle —costing the company and city money.

Van in disguise

An important piece of advice to van drivers who wish to demonstrate their rightful place on the road is that it is sometimes necessary to do this incognito if you do not have the time to enjoy a joke and pint with the friendly local constabulary.

If you do not have access to a plain white van (and you call yourself a van driver?), a hired vehicle is the perfect substitute, allowing you to perplex any cyclist who thinks they have the right to safe passage as they'll never be able to tell where you work.



Here in the video we see that the driver of the hired Thrifty van HX53JXR demonstrates the technique with perfection as they pull into the local DPD depot on St Philips Road.

Hook work by N4CSP

A contributor "SP" sends us a video along with the commentary

The grey car, N4CSP, is clearly in a hurry to get to the Callington Road Hospital, adjacent to the Tesco in Brislington. Unfortunately, I am about to cross the junction they wish to turn into, and so like any right-minded person who wants to exterminate another useless tax dodger, they wait until the last second to accelerate past then cut across to make the left turn.

This impressive action saved them a whole 4 seconds on their journey time, enabling them to no doubt secure a much deserved parking spot.


Interestingly, Callington Road Hospital is for people with mental health issues (no, not cyclists, proper weirdos), although I was unable to tell if the driver of N4 CSP was a member of staff in a hurry to beat up some of the patients, or a patient desperate to secure a fresh supply of Prozac.

Parking in and near hospitals are a controversial issue -the EP recently printed a lovely letter by Brian Rogers of Kingsdown , which we have covered, in which the way that fit and healthy cyclists get in the way of people trying to get to hospital:

These tax-payer funded lycra clad louts have spent the last 14 years "saving" the planet by not using cars as they abuse anyone who must use a car for such essential travel as work or hospital visits.

Well, "SP, you may have met Mr Rogers himself. At least this time he wasn't held up.  As for the claim that cyclists aren't "proper wierdos", we would dispute that. Grown men do not normally dress in plastic bags.

Left Hook at Kellaway Building Supplies

A tax-dodging troublemaker emails us this video to say "Is this white van DK04TBX that nearly ran me over on June 10 in its rush to get to Kellaway Building Supplies on Shaldon Road yours?"

Here is the response composed by our lawyers

• Askmid says this vehicle is a VW Transport T30TDi. As the Bristol Traffic Team's white van is a Ford Transit at least ten years older, we deny responsibility.
• We think all criticism of this van is unfounded, as by accelerating past the bicycle before cutting over it, it left plenty of room.
• By indicating its intent to turn left while it went past the bicycle, the cyclist had plenty of time to take evasive action.
• Kellaway Building supplies plays a key role in supplying everything a white van in the building trade needs apart from copies of the Sun and cans of Red Bull. As the Bristol Traffic van is a key part of the Bristol sex industry supply chain, Kellaway Building Supplies rarely appears in our list of destinations, apart from when meeting the needs of an individual with an obsession about loft insulation. A superinjunction prevents us identifying the specific board members of one of our local football teams.

We trust that these answers are satisfactory.

Bristol Cyclista meets RL54OHG on Gloucester Road

Youtube recommends this video to us, of a cyclist being passed by a car that proceeds to stop to pick up their friend waiting by the roadside.
Personally, we don't see the problem and hence why the rider was arguing with the driver

1. Even though the future passenger was waiting right at the corner, the driver did pass the cyclist rather than swerve straight in. This forced the driver to drive longer, and the pedestrian to walk a  bit. Such selfless acts are not acknowledged by the cyclist.
2. The car did actually indicate when turning in, and all its brake lights were working.
3. By pulling in to the bike lane rather than waiting behind the cyclist, the three cars behind were not held up.
4. Despite the abuse the Bristol Cyclista lays on the tax payer, he is gracious and polite.

More Cotham Hill/Whiteladies Road lorry/bike crash photos

This is the rest of the photo set.

It's pretty depressing to see this, especially on a road that is almost entirely given over to students walking and cycling in to college on.

The lorry was turning in from Whiteladies Road -probably heading inbound (left turn), though it may have turned right.

This is the view from the builders' merchants; there's a small lane before the entrance. The parked cars on the side make getting into the building site a fairly tricky turn; presumably it had to to swing out wide, and somehow a bike ended up on the inside of the bend.

AY56AEP, for the databases

Note this closing scene here: the road is closed and yet still a white van tries to get past the police car; ends up being waved down by the police and made to/helped to back out onto Whiteladies Road, then go down a block before turning off. This may answer some questions about delivery van driver literacy, else "Police Road Closed" doesn't apply if you are just on your way through quickly.

"Life Changing Injuries" on Cotham Hill

Cotham Hill, 11:30am, December 1. Crisp, and traffic free. Lovely.

Or is it? Why exactly is it traffic free? It looks like the road is closed and one bystander was talking about a group of police chasing someone down a side road.

What's that at the end? A lorry. One turning into the builders' merchants.

Why has it stopped?

The bike under the passenger front wheels provides a clue. Apparently while the lorry was doing a wide turn into the site, someone on a bicycle managed to end up under its wheels. At the scene, people were saying "broken leg", but the story is now that a woman cyclist has been left with life-changing injuries.

All we can say is that we hope that is not the case -that she does recover.

Product Placement: R.P. Glass of Bristol

It's notable that our denunciation of the 20 mph zones came out on November 17 -it was 24 hours after we broke the news that the Evening Post discovered the news.

As you may recall, we also complained that the so-called mainstream press would be seeking quotes from such organisations as the Association of British Drivers, and not us, Bristol's premier pro-car news organisation.

When will they realise: the ABD do not represent Bristol Drivers!

Look what they say about this proposal:

"It's difficult for drivers to stay at 20mph in modern cars, you have to keep it in third gear and keep your eyes on the speedometer. You could be skittling over pedestrians at 20mph that you would have seen if you were going 30mph.

It could make the situation worse."

See that? The ABD are worrying about the safety of pedestrians. When did we, the city's drivers care about that? We want them banned from the streets along with their bus using and cycling friends. There shouldn't be any pedestrians out there for us to worry about.

But what really hurts us is this claim that having to keep an eye on the speedo will cause drivers to take their eyes of the road. This shows us, sadly, how out of touch Captain Mainwaring and the rest of the ABD folk are. They may go out for "quick jaunts" in their beige Austin Allegros, taking care to top up the windscreen and radiator water levels, and wearing both driving gloves and a flat cap, but the rest of us have moved on. Driving round town is not about watching where you are going: it is about phoning ahead to your destination complaining that you will be late because there is another bastard cyclist in the way. You don't look down to see the speedo, you look up from the phone where you are trying to compose a text message.

These people have just lost touch. Pity. We could have made a great team.

Now, if you are going to use "safety" as a reason to argue for 30mph limits -you really need some good arguments that are up to date with modern driving techniques. For this end, we have co-opted the white van of R.P. Glass, on their way up Shaldon Road to Kellaway Building Supplies.

First, an apology not just for the sound but the placement of the camera, our unwitting cyclist is still trying to adjust it to get the "light" to work. If only only they knew.

As you can see, the cyclist is pootling up a hill at 10-15 mph, the van is coming up at 30+. As it passes the cyclist, it has its left turn indicator on, indicating it is about to swerve in front of the bicycle and enter the building supplies site.

The only way this operation can be accomplished safely, for the van to clear the bicycle, is at speeds of 30 mph or greater: proper speeds. At 20 mph the van isn't going to go fast enough to get past the cyclist, it's going to end up having to pull in right over the cyclist. Which will then be the fault of this cyclist, who is clearly guilty of not following Transport for London's Cycle/Lorry safety guidelines; guidelines which tell bicycles not to get on the left of left-turning lorries. But it will also be the fault of all those cycling campaigners who pushed for lower limits. Yet who will get the blame? That's right, van drivers like the one driving R.P. Glass of Bristol on Tuesday November 23.