WN15UKX beats the school run queues

It's term time in the city, a so the morning rush hour is worse, and we've seen the return of the mid-afternoon one, seen here.

In order to get anywhere, you need "flexible and imaginative solutions" as our Brexit negotiators say.


Here the driver of WN15UKX finds it impossible to make progress without risking their wing mirrors.

Residents of the inner city know that having wing mirrors is a sign of weakness, but here the driver of WN15 UKX isn't going to let the fact they value their bodywork slow them down. Instead, a neat little nip up onto the pavement, a quick sprint at 14 mph down the pavement and they are on their way. Maybe he was late for child pickup. Because you wouldn't want your child to walk home: it isn't safe, not even on the pavements.

Its drivers like this which give us selfish wanker BMW owners a bad reputation.

Pavements cause pollution.

Known saboteur Redvee has a video up showing the taxi WR54KZX forced to drive on the pavement to turn left into Bridewell Street.



We say forced, as this is clearly due to the Metrobus roadworks going on further ahead on the road. Before Metrobus there were never any queues on the roads leading to the Centre, and so no need for taxis to drive on pavements in order to stop this city grinding to a halt. And, as this is a 2004 EURO3 Diesel taxi, the pollution from its engine is awful, even by the standards of the VW test rigging team. By driving up on the pavement, the Taxi reduced the amount of pollution the city experiences. This is why pavements cause pollution. No pavements: more lanes. No pavements: fewer people walking, no need for zebra crossings or pedestrian phases in lights. We must do more in our city to discourage walking —even more than the Metrobus works team are already doing for us.

One thing to consider though: the taxi did go up the blind spot of that bus. If the bus had turned left the taxi and its passengers could have been crushed.


We propose that every bus and lorry in the city should have a sign warning taxis not to drive up the inside of them to prevent such a calamity happening in future

Love Bristol Go Brent #3

As we said, the pavement provides extra parking options. First, note the bollards, They aren't designed to stop vehicles getting on to the pavement so much as to make it clear to pedestrians that turning vehicles can cut over that corner. Vans that want to park can just get up onto the pavement past the bollards


Some viewers may think "this road is four lanes wide in every direction, and the pavement is perfectly wide enough to have a good, segregated bike lane". Those people are missing the point.

  
The four-lane-wide road provides enough space for an HGV to do a U-turn.
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So letting it get up and park on the pavement in the direction it's going.

You couldn't do that if there was a cycle path here.

The sheer provision of a vast off-road "pavement" here is a fantastic facility for motorists. It's wide enough that street furniture can be kept far enough back to make parking along here easy -regardless of the length of your vehicle.

Bristol just lacks the imagination. Even that "let them park on the pavements" mayoral candidate explicitly mentioned Gloucester road as an example place where paveparking shouldn't be permitted.

Yet Gloucester Road is a shopping street -like this one in London- the provisioning of more pavement parking area is what is critical to keep it alive. Look at the one here -even with all this excellent paveparking it's barely surviving.

Pavedriving Swindon style

While here in Bristol the local rag is obsessed by pavement cycling, Swindon drivers have their own way of dealing with road closures... Pavedriving!. It's exciting, free, and should be an Olympic sport.

NC53BOV: "try your best"

Previously: Clifton. Today. Montpelier. We are going to show how the drivers in this part of the city not only know the width of their vehicles, but have far better situational awareness than other parts of the city. Look at this video here.



Some points.

1. The delivery van -whose way forward is blocked by roadworks- manages to reverse all the way back up the road to the next turning point. That is not something a normal driving test does, but it is hard. This person is skilled.
2. After getting past it, the non-road-tax-paying cameraman continues on their way.
3. Just as they are going past an expensive car, that car starts to pull forwards. We'd say pull out but in this road the pavement is about 1/3 of the actual roadway. That's why the driver of "NC53 BOV" didn't indicate; he wasn't pulling out.
4. The cyclist, who appears to be somewhat committed to the pass and exclaims "wait" and pulls past them. This is insensitive cycling and shows inadequate situational awareness.
5. The car driver isn't that happy with it, and after waiting a couple of seconds to get over the affront, sprints up fairly aggressively and puts some pressure on the bicycle to speed up. But he keeps his distance, there's nothing too threatening. Of course, driving half-on the pavement does limit your ability to put your foot down.
6. At the junction, the driver pulls up alongside and there is a polite discussion.

That's the difference between London and Bristol. In London: a fight. In Bristol a quiet exchange of views. The tax dodger explains that they are just trying to get to their destination alive. The driver of NC53BOV replies "try your best". The cyclist then congratulates them on their awareness of their surroundings and notes that they are more aware of them than the driver of CU54UWV. Then the troublemaker heads off towards St Werburghs.

After giving the tax dodger a chance to get ahead, the driver of the Audi RS6 Quattro shows that a key benefit of the automatic transmission and four wheel drive is the ability to put your foot down and have the car react, bringing you up to 40 mph in a 20mph zone in seconds. They manage to get safely past the cyclist before the oncoming traffic has a chance to get close, and, after making up for lost time, continue on the rat-run to the St Pauls Roundabout. Notice that despite his earlier unhappiness, he gives the bicycle plenty of room. This is someone who knows how to overtake safely, is aware of their surroundings, and able to adapt to them.

Bristol's Most Determined Paveparker

Here at the traffic blog we applaud the British stiff-upper lip and our relentless desire to carry on as normal in difficult circumstances. It's summed up at the end of Carry On Up the Khyber, with Sid James and the gang enjoying a dinner party whilst the natives attack and the building crumbles around them. So when the Bristol Evening Post had their old brick print hall demolished, we naturally thought it might signal the end of their hypocritical rants about pavement cycling whilst casually ignoring the car paveparking (and pavedriving) that went on under their very noses. Apparently in Bristol cycling on the pavement is the most heinous crime a cyclist can commit, and we should all be heavily fined,locked up and subjected to torture (eg having to watch the X Factor endlessly). But, it's okay to squeeze a car or two into any available pavement space.

So we can but admire this determined paveparker in the photo who managed to drive up the pavement without knocking anyone over and reverse their vehicle onto it's little platform. Well done!. The drab grey monolithic print hall may be gone, but paveparking space is still available. Pavement cycling is just evil, but paveparking like this is so cooooool....

Feedback and the implications for SITA S788NNK

Our coverage of one truck driver giving the pedestrians the abuse they deserve has proved very poplar. We know this as Youtube sent us an email saying "your video might be eligible for the YouTube Partnership Programme, which allows you to make money from playbacks of your video.", which implies more than eight people saw it.

We also got many comments on the video, some of which were sadly negative towards us. luckyeightball said

the only crime here is decent hard working blokes trying to earn a honest living, get pin pointed by some p**ck who walks around filming people, i bet he takes the videos home and masterbates in his garden shed to the thought of knowing he's caused someone grievance, probably lives with his mum too, gimp

Bristol Traffic is a team project, everyone in the city participates. Those of us who work in the Bristol sex industry supply chain don't need to sneak off to the garden shed as we have discounted "access" to the professionals who provide their services down in Stokes Croft. As we are regulars we even get rebates when things don't work as expected. Plus the wifi doesn't get to the shed.

Humpski2817 said

If I was this driver I would go to you tube and quote their Privacy Complaint Guidelines as I am quite sure you do not have permission to use his image and as the say in the account policies "let us know if videos or comments on the site violate your privacy or sense of safety."

We've discussed this before. You have to give up some expectations of privacy on the streets. Public Place = public. Private place = private. It's an interesting issue though, with Google Streetview being the cutting edge. To launch that service in Germany, they've had to remove the houses and gardens from the view, which means that street views have entire houses missing, so limiting their value. We are glad therefore for your awareness of these issues, though feel you have some more learning on this topic before your statements come off as well-informed. But it's a start.

The most insightful comment came from SuperJonah2010

"i personely believe as a hgv driver that bristol is a hard town to be in.and that the actions of the guy with the cammera are intimidating and the driver would of seen him as a threat!as he said he chased him down the road in his own posting!i would of thought about my load and is that guy pulling a knife or a gun out of his rucksack!it happend to be a camera!my actions would have been the same if not alot worse!what planet is the idiot who posted this video on!"

That really explains some of the issues HGV drivers have in the city. Our taxi driver acquaintances fear late night customers to the edges of the city, bus drivers are scared to stop on Crow Lane (update: plans to sell of the greenery may make it safer). What we hadn't realised up until now was that HGV drivers are scared of pedestrians.

Up until now we viewed them as a hazard. Admittedly, mostly to cyclists, but such incidents close off busy roads for hours, even to vans, - and parked cars. And, because they have better negotiating power in narrow roads, we aren't that fond of HGVs . But we hadn't realised that they were scared of pedestrians! That changes the whole view of things. They must be terrified of doing any of the "shared space" roads like Cotham Hill or Picton Street. Anyone walking down the middle of the road may suddenly get out a firearm or knife and hijack your load! This continuous fear of pedestrians must make the entire city a stressful place to do deliveries -far better to stay in Avonmouth where you don't see people walking around, and if you do, you can call the police and report them.

This fear of highway robbery must also trigger the use of classic military tactics, the key ones being: keep moving and take the high ground.

We can see an example of this at the bottom of Cotham Brow, looking towards the Arches. Our white van is stuck at the lights. We aren't worried about anyone stealing our load as we'll just report to the police that someone else has stolen a "Edmond and Cheggers Inflatable Doll Party Pack" and they'll drive up the A38 following the laughter on the pedestrians until they find the culprits. The Nisa Today lorry was facing the same direction when it swung left into Kingsley Road and got into that debate with the pedestrian about whether they should have indicated before the turn. The answer from a game theory perspective is of course: no, don't signal your intent -it makes it harder for them to plan their attack.

Today we are held up by some lights, cars coming from Cromwell Road are heading up from the Arches to Cotham Brow. This is a narrow road with parking spaces on either side of the road almost deliberately laid out to create conflict -conflict the parking review will leave in. For example, those cars on the left? Short stay parking, with only 40cm of pavement alongside there's no room to get wheels on the pavement, so it creates a choke point -a bit of traffic calming. And a place where a malicious pedestrian could attack a lorry driver and make off with their payload.

The small cars, like the council car, don't have a problem, they pootle up the road. But what of the SITA van S788NNK? The choke point here exposes them to attack -anyone could pop out from the side road hold a knife, a gun, a rolled up newspaper (we've all seen that Bourne Identity film -we know newspapers are weapons), and take their valuable payload of ready-for-recycling cardboard.

How will the SITA drivers handle it? With Military precision.


They seize the enemy territory by going straight onto the pavement. Notice how they do it. No halfhearted "protect the wheels" actions, but a full "take the high ground" operation to get along the pavement and then drop down once they get past the narrowness.

By keeping the forward momentum, the oppo team is left on the defensive, and without the pavement they can't hang back and hope to jump up into the cab as it goes past.

Together, this ensures that the SITA cardboard will reach its destination securely.

This whole notion that lorry and HGV drivers fear pedestrians is going change some of our thinking. In fact it's profound. It explains a lot of city design -like the pedestrian underpasses of the Bearpit, St Paul's and Lawrence Hill roundabouts. They must have gone in not just to keep motor traffic speeds up, but to reduce the risk of pedestrians attacking trucks. It also explains why money needs to be invested in making pedestrians and cyclists feel unwelcome in those parts of the city popular with HGVs -because the drivers don't want them there.

The implications of this discovery are still trickling through our brains, so expect more coverage of the topic in the new year. Until then, all those pedestrians whom we now suspect read this blog -remember, the HGV driver is more scared of you!

Alloy wheels are for outsiders

Footage of someone on Cobourg Road managing to get their car out safely.

This is why in inner city Bristol you don't want alloy wheels. They may be a status symbol for some drivers, but they are clearly not people who have to drive round the anti-car parts of town, where getting on and off pavements and skirting kerbstones are a regular part of every driving journey. They are a luxury for outsiders.

Insensitive Parking on Cotham Hill

It's not often that we criticise vehicles for parking badly on the pavement, especially white vans, but today we must mention the PN58PPO Nationwide Van Hire van whose rear-end is poking out the back of the former-petrol-station-now-car-park on Cotham Hill, our very own "front-line" in the war on motorists.


It has forced KU59DLJ to swerve into the road while driving up the pavement to its parking space.


The fact that KU59DLJ's indicators do not appear to be working made this a dangerous manoeuvre.

Secret College Green Parking

You've got to hand it to our city's authorities when promoting the city's tourist jewels! With visitors piling into the city recently for the marathon, it was important to showcase some of the city's treasures. Rather than waste time by having runners' families meandering on foot around College Green, the delightful Norman gate house and College Square behind, we managed to close College Square, turn it into a car park and have our visitors like CK03VPN actually DRIVE THROUGH the 12th. century monument in their cars. How imaginative is that??

And just in case you think these intrepid drivers might have been breaking the law - No! Thanks to the Fluorescent Jacket (Hazard Flasher Amendment) Act: 2005, all we need to do is station someone in a green jacket and lo! it's legal.

One nice detail for those of you not enamoured with the Lycra louts - the authorities built some temporary tarmac dropped kerbs for cars like CE05VAV to mount the pavement. These, you will be pleased to hear, were removed again immediately after the weekend so as to deter the cyclists from using this very tempting car-free route from Park Street to Harbourside.

(Photos and Text from "anon")

Avoiding the Heisenberg Problem on stokes croft

A week after someone ends up under a lorry here, a day after coverage on the local BBC news, and we have the council survey team out in force on Stokes Croft. There they are on the deck chairs behind the (shiny new) bike racks, just past the car up on the pavement by the double yellow lines.

One of the big problems in any scientific measuring experiments are the effect of the observers on the behaviour of the system. In particle physics, the Heisenberg Problem surfaces -measuring something's mass slows it down; measuring something's velocity stops you weighing it. With humans, it is often the Hawthorn Effect: the act of being monitored changes people's behaviour. Either way: the observers get in the way. For this survey, the risk is that the survey cars will impinge on the flow of traffic, so altering the number, placement and velocity of the vehicles.

The survey team have anticipated this, and yet still managed to park their survey cars as close as they can to their deck chairs, by driving both their vehicles V127LEU and GK57YZS the wrong way down the Nine Tree Hill one-way section. They have not approached Stokes Croft at all, not even before the experiment began.

This leaves road unmodified; the bike lanes in Stokes Croft in their "raw" state, unobstructed by any more vehicles than normal.

Tax-dodging cyclists reading this blog may wish to save and print out a copy of the survey team and vehicles contraflowing the road and nipping up on the pavement. That way, when they are stopped by the police for illegally mimicing the same operation, they can declare that they are part of the Bristol Traffic survey team, and merely following the same scientific rigour when approaching the Stoke's Croft junction: to observe without interfering.

Pedestrians holding up traffic

These cars are having their journey through Cobourg Road, Montpelier held up by a selfish pedestrian.

The tax-dodging walker is happily strolling down the pavement, ignoring the fact that the only way to get down this road by car is to drive with two wheels on the aforementioned pavement. Because the pedestrian is uncaringly occupying the same space, the cars are forced to crawl along at his speed.